A BABY AFTER 40… A MIRACLE OF LIFE? NOT ENTIRELY

When Cameron Diaz announced the birth of her daughter, Raddix, a few days ago, at age 47, a lot of us, including me, couldn’t help asking: But how ?

Not that the genetic details of that achievement are any of our business, but we want to know if it’s possible. Can someone in their late 40s really have a baby of their own ? We just want hope… Or at least, avoid false hope!

IT DOES HAPPEN, THOUGH !

I mean, look at celebrities like Kelly Preston – aka Ms. John Travolta (who had a baby at 48), Halle Berry (who had her second child at 46), Laura Linney (who gave birth at 49), and Janet Jackson (who had her first child at 50!). If that isn’t hope, what is it?

Many women in their late 30s and early 40s go through IVF only to fail becoming pregnant. What fertility doctors do not always explain at first, is that not every woman you see on the cover of a magazine is using her own eggs…

THE FACTS

Here come the marvels of modern medicine. Fertility doctors around the world say that these days, it’s not that difficult to get pregnant in your late 40s. As long as you have two things: money and someone else’s eggs.

The fact is that donor eggs could help older women, younger women with “bad” eggs, women who had many failed rounds of IVG or repeated miscarriages, have a baby. Experts say the success rate is around 70%.

Because it is primarily the age of the eggs, not that of the woman and her uterus, which determines a successful pregnancy. That is why some women freeze their eggs when they are younger, to be able to work with their own eggs later on during IVF.

THE DOWNSIDES OF DONOR EGGS

Besides the fact that the baby does not carry your genes, you may suddenly have second thoughts about revealing how you became pregnant, though, it would be the responsible thing to do, not to give other women false hopes. The question, is “Are we allowed to have privacy when we go through such planned, assisted pregnancy?” Women are regularly punished for their choices, whether they have baby too young, or too old. We are either irresponsible or selfish…

So, by being vocal about your choices, you open the door to the judgment of the masses. By not, you may induce unrealistic expectations in other women.

WHAT’S IMPORTANT, AFTER ALL ?

At this point in my life, I feel the real question women like me should ask themselves, before opting or not for certain solutions, is: “Do I really want to be a mother?” Of course, one must think well of the consequences of becoming a parent late in life. Besides a higher probability of dying when the child is still young, the question of lesser energy to raise a child also has its importance. But nothing is all good or all bad, there’s positive and negative in every situation.

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